As you read this, I will tell you that Phoebe and I are now on spring break in NYC. Prior to leaving, I told P. we needed to pack. Being she is a very "mature" five, I said to her:
JESSICA: Go and pick out some clothes to bring on our trip.
Moments later, Phoebe enters my bedroom and proceeds to dump THIS on my bed.
Then, before I could inform her that I didn't mean the entire contents of her closet, she had already left the room while yelling:
PHOEBE: Wait, I'm not done:
only to return so that she could dump this on my bed as well:
When I tried to explain to her that a) we were only going for a few days and b) we were flying economy, not CARGO, she insisted that she NEEDED all of this. I then tried to reason with her by informing her that the size of the bunny rabbit alone would require me to buy an additional seat. Her response was to run and grab her Hello Kitty wallet, pull out four singles that she stole from me I have no recall of giving her and tell me:
PHOEBE: Then I'll buy it.
At this point, I went and grabbed a chair and showed her how much of an airline seat four dollars would actually get her:
Then, being the "mature" five year old that I thought she was combined with the fact that she does have 20/20 vision, Phoebe quickly "came around' and after I promised her a chocolate bar for the plane ride realized she had gone way overboard, allowing me to pack for both of us.
WINNERS OF THE BOOK "HOW TO TRAUMATIZE YOUR CHILDREN"
(after narrowing it down to 15- all names went into a hat and Phoebe picked the final 10) and here they are (congrats and thanks for participating):
http://www.gonecrazy-bebacksoon.blogspot.com
http://www.annsrants.blogspot.com
http://marymoores.blogspot.com
http://www.thewoodlife.blogspot.com
http://www.lovemyjared.blogspot.com
http://www.jamjarboogie.blogspot.com
http://www.pinkhollyhock.blogspot.com
http://www.writeonyo.typepad.com
and Janine: who doesn't have a blog yet but whose comment was priceless.
Please email me where you want me to send the book. Thanks again for playing.....


Have a great trip to NYC.
Did she remember socks? My boys would never remember socks.
Posted by: Michele | April 04, 2009 at 02:31 AM
Phoebe packs like my husband packs. And my bribes don't consist of candy.
Posted by: Beth | April 04, 2009 at 04:03 AM
I think the "pack an outfit for all possible events" is a female dominant trait. I, myself, still struggle with this one.
Posted by: The Dental Maven | April 04, 2009 at 05:15 AM
I love the fact that your daughter's wardrobe supports breast cancer survivors. And the four dollars--what a great problem solver she is!
Posted by: prefers her fantasy life | April 04, 2009 at 05:56 AM
If she thinks she needs this much clothing now, imagine what will happen when she hits the teenage years and adds shoes and accessories to the load... You really will need to fly cargo :)
Posted by: KathyB! | April 04, 2009 at 06:26 AM
Girl knows how to pack!
Posted by: Dana's Brain | April 04, 2009 at 07:13 AM
Too funny! I think you were being pretty generous with how much of a seat $4 buys. LOL
Posted by: Holly | April 04, 2009 at 08:12 AM
Damn! I never win anything.
I pack like Phoebe packs. There's no harm in that, is there? I like to have lots of choices available to me.
Posted by: blognut | April 04, 2009 at 08:40 AM
We had to evacuate our home due to a fire last fall, and I told my then 4 y/o daughter to go pack a few things. All she packed was stuffed animals, because apparently they make a great substitute for underwear.
Posted by: Andrea's Sweet Life | April 04, 2009 at 08:45 AM
I don't understand what's so funny, or not funny for that matter. I do exactly as Phoebe did when my wife asks me to pack.
Posted by: stoneskin | April 04, 2009 at 10:01 AM
Phoebe is a genius. I love it. I bet her little butt could fit in the 4$ square.
Posted by: Busy Bee Suz | April 04, 2009 at 10:32 AM
Woot! Can't wait to read the book. Oh, and Phoebe might want to pack something a bit warmer. Then again,she could just wear the bunny.
Posted by: Ann's Rants | April 04, 2009 at 11:02 AM
My daughter would have either said that she could sit on my lap or that the bunny could sit on my lap. I'm betting she wouldn't budge. Or it would cost me more than chocolate. You're lucky.
Posted by: kristin | April 04, 2009 at 11:08 AM
i always pack too much underwears. like i'm going to run out, or need to change underwears five times a day.
i won!! i won something! ohhhh!!! i NEVER win any of these blog contests where you bare your soul and feel like an ass, but want the book/porn/magazine/mug/sticker!!
Posted by: Ms. Changes Pants While Driving | April 04, 2009 at 12:12 PM
oh, and why did i think phoebe was 13?
Posted by: Ms. Changes Pants While Driving | April 04, 2009 at 12:13 PM
Hey! That's how I pack. Because you never know when a stuffed animal or five might come in handy...
Posted by: Kate Coveny Hood | April 04, 2009 at 12:19 PM
WOo Hoo!! I won! I won!! I really really won!!
And your daughter's idea of packing for a few days is very similar to mine...
Posted by: Mary @ Holy Mackerel | April 04, 2009 at 01:06 PM
I'm going to diet until I can fit into that seat.
Posted by: Marinka | April 04, 2009 at 01:45 PM
Too Funny! I love what children find important and necessary ... things that make them feel happy and safe first, underwear second. Maybe we'd all be better off if we grabbed our stuffed animals first. :)
Small Footprints
http://reducefootprints.blogspot.com
Posted by: Small Footprints | April 04, 2009 at 01:45 PM
Haha she packs like me. Make sure to bring all kinds of clothes. Just in case :D
Four dollars won't even buy you that anymore!
Posted by: Felisa | April 04, 2009 at 03:02 PM
How does one go about procuring a mature five-year-old?
Any and all tips are welcome.
Posted by: San Diego Momma | April 04, 2009 at 03:12 PM
Congrats to the winners! Woohoo!
Phoebe is a genius! She offered to pay. Aw, that is so damn cute.
Enjoy New York and eat a pizza slice for me. I really miss N.Y. pizza.
Posted by: Akilah Sakai | April 04, 2009 at 03:58 PM
Hey where are you in NY? Are you or do you celebrate Passover? email me michellejoy61@gmail.com!!!
Posted by: michelle | April 04, 2009 at 04:00 PM
Yay! Looking forward to the book. And plus? I just love winning shit. But then again, who doesn't?
I am the worst packer of all time. I want to take everything, then I stress over what I can't take. It's an illness.
I flew from Portland OR to New Orleans in February on Continental. NO FREE CHECKED BAGS. Every bag had a fee. Total crap. Hope you bought your ticket on (1) a better airline or (2) before that little price gouging policy went into effect.
Happy and safe travels : )
Posted by: shana | April 04, 2009 at 05:18 PM
Ooh, that's a great illustration of how expensive it is to fly!
Posted by: Ronnica | April 04, 2009 at 05:19 PM